Having A Bad Day

[Flatiron]

Having a Bad Day

Thought I would send out something to make one realize your job is not that bad.....Rob is a commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in Louisiana Heperforms underwater repairs on offshore drilling rigs.

Below is an E-mail he sent to his sister. She then sent it to radio station 103.2 on FM dial in Ft. Wayne , Indiana , who was sponsoring a worst job experience contest.

Needless to say, she won.

Hi Sue,

Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother.

Last week I had a bad day at the office. I know you've been feeling down lately at work, so I thought I would share my dilemma with you to make you realize it's not so bad after all.

Before I can tell you what happened to me, I first must bore you with a few technicalities of my job. As you know, my office lies at the bottom of the sea.

I wear a suit to the office. It's a wet suit. This time of year the water is quite cool. So what we do to keep warm is this: We have a diesel powered industrial water heater. This $20,000 piece of equipment sucks the water out of the sea. It heats it to a delightful temperature.

It then pumps it down to the diver through a garden hose, which is taped to the air hose. Now this sounds like a darn good plan, and I've used it several times with no complaints.

What I do, when I get to the bottom and start working, is take the hose and stuff it down the back of my wet suit. This floods my whole suit with warm water. It's like working in a Jacuzzi.

Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my butt started to itch. So, of course, I scratched it.

This only made things worse. Within a few seconds my butt started to burn. I pulled the hose out from my back, but the damage was done. In agony I realized what had happened.

The hot water machine had sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into my suit. Now, since I don't have any hair on my back, the jellyfish couldn't stick to it however, the crack of my butt was not as fortunate.

When I scratched what I thought was an itch, I was actually grinding the jellyfish into the crack of my butt.

I informed the dive supervisor of my dilemma over the communicator. His instructions were unclear due to the fact that he, along with five other divers, were all laughing hysterically.

Needless to say I aborted the dive. I was instructed to make three agonizing in-water decompression stops totaling thirty-five minutes before I could reach the surface to begin my chamber dry decompression.

When I arrived at the surface, I was wearing nothing but my brass helmet.

As I climbed out of the water, the medic, with tears of laughter running do wn his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me to rub it on my butt as soon as I got in the chamber.

The cream put the fire out, but I couldn't poop for two days because my butt was swollen shut.

So, next time you're having a bad day at work, think about how much worse it would be if you had a jellyfish shoved up your butt.

Now repeat to yourself, 'I love my job, I love my job, I love my job.'

[JSKY]

[baker7]

hhehhehe thats funny

Brian

[Karol]

Funny!

[Pete_C]

I would have thought that they would have realized that this was a possibility and would have some sort of filtration and screening on the pump system.

Also, due to the need for decompression on returns to the surface, don't most saturation divers have a "habitat" submerged with them for "emergencies" and breaks and typically work several days down and only then have to surface and decompress? IE, the working under pressure is not as dangerous as the decompressing is so they want to minimize the number of times you decompress on a job.

Still it is possible and would be painful.

http://www.snopes.com/humor/letters/diver.asp

lists it as undetermined, neither confirmed nor proven an urban legend or hoax.

Lots of bad day stories at snopes

http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&q=b...amp;btnG=Search

Lots of sites for If you think you're having a bad day and the jellyfish story seems to hit a lot

http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&q=I...amp;btnG=Search

I guess it is the whole anal fear thing.

I like the ones here

http://lorien.ncl.ac.uk/ming/dept/Fun/jokes/badday.htm

Next time you think that you're having a bad day recall that---

1. The average cost of rehabilitating a seal after the Exxon Valdez oil spill in Alaska was $80,000. At a special ceremony, two of the most expensively saved animals were released back into the wild amid cheers and applause from onlookers. A minute later they were both eaten by a killer whale.

2. A psychology student in New York rented out her spare room to a carpenter in order to nag him constantly and study his reactions. After a week of needling, he snapped and beat her repeatedly with an axe leaving her mentally retarded.

3. In 1992, Frank Perkins of Los Angeles made an attempt on the world flagpole-sitting record. Suffering from the flu he came down eight hours short of the 400 day record, his sponsor had gone bust, his girlfriend had left him and his phone and electricity had been cut off.

4. A woman came home to find her husband in the kitchen, shaking frantically with what looked like a wire running from his waist towards the electric kettle. Intending to jolt him away from the deadly current she whacked him with a handy plank of wood by the back door, breaking his arm in two places. Till that moment he had been happily listening to his Walkman.

5. Two animal rights protestors were protesting at the cruelty of sending pigs to a slaughterhouse in Bonn. Suddenly the pigs, all two thousand of them, escaped through a broken fence and trampled the two hapless protestors to death.

And the capper....

6. Iraqi terrorist, Khay Rahnajet, didn't pay enough postage on a letter bomb. It came back "return to sender" stamped on it. Forgetting that it was the bomb, he opened it and was blown to bits.

[JDoors]

... A minute later [the two seals] were both eaten by a killer whale. ...

On the other hand, it was a good day for the killer whale!