Dear Dogs And Cats

[bar5]

Credit to Sharber60 (Worldstart).

I loved this, and thought you all would enjoy it.

Dear Dogs and Cats,

The dishes with the paw print are yours and contain your food. The other

dishes are mine and contain my food.

Please note, placing a paw print in he middle of my plate and food does

not stake a claim for it becoming your food dish, nor do I find that

aesthetically pleasing in the slightest.

The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a racetrack. Beating

me to the bottom is not the object. Tripping me doesn't help because I

fall faster than you can run.

I cannot buy anything bigger than a king sized bed. I am very sorry

about this. Do not think I will continue sleeping on the couch to ensure

your comfort. Dogs and cats can actually curl up in a ball when they

sleep.

It is not necessary to sleep perpendicular to each other stretched out

To the fullest extent possible. I also know that sticking tails straight

out and having tongues hanging out the other end to maximize space is

nothing but sarcasm.

For the last time, there is not a secret exit from the bathroom. If by

some miracle I beat you there and manage to get the door shut, it is not

necessary to claw, whine, meow, try to turn the knob or get your paw

under the edge and try to pull the door open. I must exit through the

same door I entered. Also, I have been using the bathroom for

years-canine or feline attendance is not mandatory.

The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt.

I cannot stress this enough!

To pacify you, my dear pets, I have posted the following message on our

front door:

Rules for Non-Pet Owners Who Visit and Like to Complain About Our Pets:

1. They live here. You don't.

2. If you don't want their hair on your clothes, stay off the

furniture.(That's why they call it "fur"niture.) 3. I like my pets a lot

better than most people.

4. To you, it's an animal. To me, he/she is an adopted son/daughter who

is short, hairy, walks on all fours and doesn't speak clearly.

Dogs and cats are better than kids ...they eat less, don't ask for money

all the time, are easier to train, usually come when called, never drive

your car, don't hang out with drug-using friends, don't smoke or drink,

don't worry about having to buy the latest fashions, don't wear your

clothes, and don't need a gazillion dollars for college - and if they

get pregnant, you can sell the children.

[Chappy]

I got sent this one some time back and LOVED IT!!!

All pet owners will relate to pretty much all of these at some time in their lives.

[thesidekickcat]

Thanks for passing on a good one Barb,

Now to just get my cat to stop opening the bathroom door when I am in there, or taking over the foot of the bed or my pillow...!!!

Pat

God bless everyone.

[bearskin]

I know my maltese must love us....he lets us sleep on HIS king size bed..you'd be surprised how much room a 9 pound dog can take up on a king size bed.