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The dangerous addiction of SPS. Every day several inocent and unknowing posters become victim to SPS Starving Poster Syndrome. They become so addicted to posting in online forums and instant messaging that they never leave their seats to eat. Their body filled with only mountain dew and cheesy puffs they become delusional and heavily infected with SPS. Once someone is infected they spread the disease by posting about food products.

Here is some posts from an infected member who unfortunately ran out of his reachable food supply.

30 minutes now. feeling soo weak. i have spotted some fallen cheesy puffs behind the desk. will attempt to capture with my toes.....

attempt failed.....

LOL i found lots ABC gum under desk. flavor is still there.

hour 3 ----- feeling weak again. have spotted bag of left over holloween candy from last year aproximatly 10ft away. i will embark on a level 12 quest for this treasure.....

quest failed due to a chair blockade and shortness of keyboard cord.

hour 6 ---- moral is high. parental unit sky dropped supplies. PB sandwiches and milk.

hour 10 ---- internet aliens have taken my mouse hostage and demand that my room be cleaned. attempts to click have failed. all further clicking operations will be on hold indefinantly.

It's too late for this individual. By the time he finally got away from the computer and found a source of nourishment he had forgotten how to eat and attempted to place butter in the CD Drive.

Another individual after being infected with this disease drug his fridge to his desk and gorged himself. after seeing a shocked kitty pic and a reference to ninja burger he laughed and chocked on a 1lb block of cheese.

This has been a public post announcement paid for by The Happy Cheese Block Corporation.

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The dangerous addiction of SPS. Every day several inocent and unknowing posters become victim to SPS Starving Poster Syndrome. They become so addicted to posting in online forums and instant messaging that they never leave their seats to eat. Their body filled with only mountain dew and cheesy puffs they become delusional and heavily infected with SPS. Once someone is infected they spread the disease by posting about food products.

Here is some posts from an infected member who unfortunately ran out of his reachable food supply.

30 minutes now. feeling soo weak. i have spotted some fallen cheesy puffs behind the desk. will attempt to capture with my toes.....

attempt failed.....

LOL i found lots ABC gum under desk. flavor is still there.

hour 3 ----- feeling weak again. have spotted bag of left over holloween candy from last year aproximatly 10ft away. i will embark on a level 12 quest for this treasure.....

quest failed due to a chair blockade and shortness of keyboard cord.

hour 6 ---- moral is high. parental unit sky dropped supplies. PB sandwiches and milk.

hour 10 ---- internet aliens have taken my mouse hostage and demand that my room be cleaned. attempts to click have failed. all further clicking operations will be on hold indefinantly.

It's too late for this individual. By the time he finally got away from the computer and found a source of nourishment he had forgotten how to eat and attempted to place butter in the CD Drive.

Another individual after being infected with this disease drug his fridge to his desk and gorged himself. after seeing a shocked kitty pic and a reference to ninja burger he laughed and chocked on a 1lb block of cheese.

This has been a public post announcement paid for by The Happy Cheese Block Corporation.

LOL :D:D:D

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So what we need is a list of places to order fast food online, and doublecheck that they will deliver it to the window near the computer. That will solve the food problem. :rolleyes:

But still need to do the bathroom breaks, so that is a good time to do the various anivirus and spyware scans or defrag system etc. :rolleyes:

Optimal use of time. Right. :rolleyes:

Oops I almost forgot, don't forget to use some of the time at the computer to earn a living to pay for all the fast food, rent, reclining computer chair to sleep in,

..... and new computer stuff. :rolleyes:

God bless everyone.

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Alright I moved my whole computer setup next to the front window. Ordered pizza, rerouted some plumming with a little carpentry work on the recliner. Sent GF lots of folwers and a card that said that the computer meant nothing to me, it was a moment of weakness. Called Apple and told them I'd come back to work as a consultant but I would have to work online only.

OK I think that covers it all. Did I forget anything? :D

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  • 11 months later...

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