handplane

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Posts posted by handplane

  14. Got One Too

    in The Comedy Club

    Posted

    GOT ONE TOO

    A man from Texas, driving a Volkswagen Beetle, pulls up next to a guy in

    an Arkansas licensed Rolls Royce at a stop sign.

    Their windows are open and he yells at the guy in the Rolls, "Hey, you got a telephone in that Rolls?"

    The guy in the Rolls says, "Yes, of course I do.."

    "I got one too... see?" the Texan says.

    "Uh, huh, yes, that's very nice."

    "You got a fax machine?" asks the Texan.

    "Why, actually, yes, I do."

    "I do too! See? It's right here!" brags the Texan.

    The light is just about to turn green and the guy in the Volkswagen says,

    "So, do you have a double bed in back there?"

    The guy in the Rolls replies, "NO! Do you?"

    "Yep, got my double bed right in back here," the Texan replies.

    The light turns and the man in the Volkswagen takes off.

    Well, the guy in the Rolls is not about to be one-upped, so he immediately

    goes to a customizing shop and orders them to put a double bed in back of

    his car.

    About two weeks later, the job is finally done. He picks up his car and

    drives all over town looking for the Volkswagen beetle with the Texas

    plates. Finally, he finds it parked alongside the road, so he pulls his Rolls up

    next to it.

    The windows on the Volkswagen are all fogged up and he feels somewhat

    awkward about it, but he gets out of his newly modified Rolls and taps on the foggy window of the Volkswagen.

    =======================

    (It's ok... The joke is CLEAN.)

    =======================

    The man in the Volkswagen finally opens the window a crack and peeks out.

    The guy with the Rolls says, "Hey, remember me?"

    "Yeah, yeah, I remember you," replies the Texan, "What's up?"

    "Check this out...I got a double bed installed in my Rolls.

    "The Texan exclaims, "YOU GOT ME OUT OF THE SHOWER TO TELL ME THAT ?!!!

  15. Spammer Arrested

    in On The Web

    Posted · Edited by handplane

    One of world's top ten spammers arrested

    Associated Press Reporting

    A 27-year-old man described as one of the world's most prolific spammers has been arrested in Seattle.

    As a result, federal authorities say computer users across the Web could notice a decrease in the amount of junk e-mail.

    Robert Soloway is accused of using networks of compromised ``zombie'' computers to send out millions upon millions of spam e-mails.

    A senior director of Microsoft's Worldwide Internet Safety Programs describes Soloway as `` one of the top ten spammers in the world.''

    A federal grand jury last week returned a 35-count indictment against Soloway charging him with mail fraud, wire fraud, e-mail fraud, aggravated identity theft and money laundering.

    Soloway has pleaded not guilty to all charges. He remains in federal detention pending a hearing Monday.

  25. My First Car!

    in Open Chat

    Posted

    First car??

    Hmm...kids nowadays eh...brand spankin new cars right after getting your license. ...

    Back in MY day ... :lol:

    I grew up in Chicago, never felt the need for a car at all, moved to the 'burbs when I graduated High School (middle 70's) and ... bought myself a brand new car. The one I wanted, the one I had posters of in my room, the one I had brochures from every auto show going back for years. I made a collage featuring the car on my bedroom door with pictures from every source I could find. Damn, I really wanted that car, so I bought it first chance I had.

    Glad I did 'cause, bless it's little soul, I had the time of my life with that car (and learned a lot of hard lessons). Thirty years later and I still wish I had one in new condition. That was one tough cookie.

    What make was it?