From A Childs Point Of View

[martymas]

The Way Children See Things!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

NUDITY I was driving with my three young children one warm summer evening when a woman in the convertible ahead of us stood up and waved. She was stark naked! As I was reeling from the shock, I heard my

5-year-old shout from the back seat, "Mom! That lady isn't wearing a seat belt!

HONESTY My son Zachary, 4, came screaming out of the bathroom to tell me he'd dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. So I fished it out and threw it in the garbage. Zachary stood there thinking for a moment, then ran to my bathroom and came out with my toothbrush. He held it up and said with a charming little smile, "We better throw this one out too then, 'cause it fell in the toilet a few days ago.

OPINIONS On the first day of school, a first-grader handed his teacher a note from his mother. The note read, "The opinions expressed by this child are not necessarily those of his parents."

KETCHUP A woman was trying hard to get the ketchup to come out of the jar.

During her struggle the phone rang so she asked her

4-year-old daughter to answer the phone.

"It's the minister, Mommy," the child said to her mother. Then she added, "Mommy can't come to the phone to talk to you right now. She's hitting the bottle."

MORE NUDITY A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found himself in the women's locker room. When he was spotted, the room burst into shrieks, with ladies grabbing towels and running for cover.

The little boy watched in amazement and then asked, "What's the matter haven't you ever seen a little boy before?"

ELDERLY While working for an organization that delivers lunches to elderly shut-ins, I used to take my 4- year-old daughter on my afternoon rounds The various appliances of old age, particularly the canes, walkers and wheelchairs, unfailingly intrigued her. One day I found her staring at a pair of false teeth soaking in a glass. As I braced myself for the inevitable barrage of questions, she merely turned and whispered, "The tooth fairy will never believe this!"

DRESS-UP A little girl was watching her parents dress for a party. When she saw her dad donning his tuxedo, she warned, "Daddy, you shouldn't wear that suit."

"And why not, darling?" "You know that it always gives you a headache the next morning.."

SCHOOL A little girl had just finished her first week of school. "I'm just wasting my time," she said to her mother. "I can't read, I can't write and they won't let me talk!"

BIBLE A little boy opened the big family bible. He was fascinated as he fingered through the old pages. Suddenly, something fell out of the Bible. He picked up the object and looked at it. What he saw was an old leaf that had been pressed in between the pages.

"Mama, look what I found", the boy called out.

" What have you got there, dear?"

With astonishment in the young boy's voice, he answered, "I think it's Adam's underwear!"

__________________

[JDoors]

All cute, but the "seatbelt" and "headache" ones are hilarious!

[martymas]

yes i agree

isnt it funny how childrens

can make us uncomfortable

and the naked one is an example

that parent was thinking

as she thought and not the child

yes had a big small on my face

when i read that

i remember when my son was four

we were driving along the street

when we passed a nice teenager dressed

in little as possable

and he said

hey dad look at sheila [girls]

with no top dress on

my wife said were the hell did he learned that from

my reply

probably from his friend

marty

[tenmm]

BIBLE A little boy opened the big family bible. He was fascinated as he fingered through the old pages. Suddenly, something fell out of the Bible. He picked up the object and looked at it. What he saw was an old leaf that had been pressed in between the pages.

"Mama, look what I found", the boy called out.

" What have you got there, dear?"

With astonishment in the young boy's voice, he answered, "I think it's Adam's underwear!"

I all most hurt myself on this one.....................

[blim]

ME TOO, TENMM!!!

"SCHOOL A little girl had just finished her first week of school. "I'm just wasting my time," she said to her mother. "I can't read, I can't write and they won't let me talk!""

This was what my son said after his first DAY of Kindergarten! He ended up being a very good reader, but still talks too much!

That one's getting passed on, thanks, Marty!

Liz