Children And Proverbs

[bar5]

A first grade teacher collected well-known proverbs. She gave each child in her class the first half of a proverb and asked them to come up with the remainder of the proverb.

There Insight May SURPRISE You !!

Better to be safe than.......... Punch A 5th grader.

Strike while the.......... Bug is close.

It's always darkest before.......... Daylight Savings Time.

Never underestimate the power of.......... Termites.

Don't bite the hand that.......... Looks dirty.

No news is.......... Impossible

A miss is as good as a.......... Mr.

You cant teach a old dog new.......... Math.

If you lie down with dog's you'll.......... Stink in the morning.

Love all, trust.......... Me.

An idle mind is.......... The best way to relax.

Laugh and the whole world laughs with you, cry and.......... You have to blow your nose.

Children should be seen and not.......... Spanked or grounded.

When the blind lead the blind....... Get out of the way.

[robroy]

good ones Barb

[Makai]

Those are funny. Kids say the darndest things. Used to like that show, and they really do.

[bar5]

Those are funny. Kids say the darndest things. Used to like that show, and they really do.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Yea, I liked that show also. Art Linkletter's "Kids Say The Darndest Things"

They are so sincere in their answers, is what makes it so funny.

Barb

[thesidekickcat]

Smart Kids!!!

Thanks Barb for posting it.

God bless everyone.

[No Username]

Elementary School Test

Pay special attention to the wording and spelling. If you know the

Bible, even a little, you'll find this hilarious! It comes from a

Catholic Elementary school test. Kids were asked questions about the old

and new testaments. The following statements about the Bible were

written by children. They have not been retouched nor corrected. (i.e.,

incorrect spelling has been left in).

1. In the first book of the bible, Guinessis. God got tired of creating

the world so he took the sabbath off.

2. Adam and Eve were created from an Apple tree. Noah's wife was

called Joan of Ark. Noah built an ark and the animals came on in pears.

3. Lots wife was a pillar of salt during the day, but a ball of fire

during the night.

4. The Jews were a proud people and throughout history they had trouble

with unsympathetic Genitals.

5. Sampson was a strongman who let himself be led astray by a Jezebel

like Delilah.

6. Samson slayed the Philistines with the axe of the Apostles.

7.Moses led the Jews to the Red sea where they made unleavened bread

which is bread without any ingredients.

8. The Egyptians were all drowned in the dessert, Afterwards, Moses

went up to Mount Cyanide to get the ten ammendments.

9. The first commandment was when Eve told Adam to eat the apple.

10. The seventh Commandment is thou shalt not admit adultery.

11. Moses died before he ever reached Canada. Then Joshua led the

Hebrews in the battle of Geritol.

12.. The greatest miricle in the Bible is when Joshua told his son to

stand still and he obeyed him.

13. David was a Hebrew king who was skilled at playing the liar. He

fought the Finkelsteins, a race of people who lived in bibical times.

14.Solomon, one of David's sons, had 300 wives and 700 porcupines.

15. When Mary heard she was the mother of Jesus, she sang the Magna

Carta.

16. When the three wise guys from the east side arrived, they found

Jesus in the manager.

17. Jesus was born because Mary had an immaculate contraption.

18. St. John the blacksmith dumped water on his head.

19. Jesus enunciated the Golden Rule, which says to do unto others

before they do one to you. He also explained, a man doth not live by

sweat alone.

20. It was a miricle when Jesus rose from the dead and managed to get

the tombstone off the entrance.

21. The people who followed the lord were called the twelve decibels.

22. The epistels were the wives of the apostals.

23. One of the oppossums was St. Matthew who was also a taximan.

24. St. Paul cavorted to Christianity, he preached holy acrimony, which

is another name for marraige.

25. Christians have only one spouse. This is called monotony.

[Makai]

LOL! No_Username those are hilarious. Holy acrimony and monotony lmao.