macmarauder Posted April 30, 2005 Report Share Posted April 30, 2005 i wanted to know how a cat thought so i hooked a mind probe up to the neighbors cat and wrote a journal about what i saw. DAY 752 - My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another houseplant.DAY 761 - Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded, must try this at the top of the stairs. In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair...must try this on their bed.DAY 762 - Slept all day so that I could annoy my captors with sleep depriving, incessant pleas for food at ungodly hours of the night.DAY 765 - Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body, in attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat I was...Hmmm. Not working according to plan ......DAY 768 - I am finally aware of how sadistic they are. For no good reason I was chosen for the water torture. This time however it included a burning foamy chemical called "shampoo." What sick minds could invent such a liquid. My only consolation is the piece of thumb still stuck between my teeth.DAY 771 - There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the foul odor of the glass tubes they call "beer." More importantly I overheard that my confinement was due to MY power of "allergies." Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage.DAY 774 - I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit. The Bird on the other hand has got to be an informant. He has mastered their frightful tongue (something akin to mole speak) and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room his safety is assured. But I can wait. It is only a matter of time. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
blim Posted April 30, 2005 Report Share Posted April 30, 2005 As a former Cat's Pet human, so true! Hopefully the cat will escape outside and present it's captors with a baby bunny head in the lap. Ugh. My dog was raised with cats (we got her at 4 years old) and she does the wrap around the leg thing, purrs, and refuses to go through a door unless its opened far enough for a horse to go through....We have a catdog.Copy, paste and email to my cat-captor friends! Liz Quote Link to post Share on other sites
robroy Posted April 30, 2005 Report Share Posted April 30, 2005 When I was a teenager (many years ago) we had a cat that brought home a pet snake.The only problem was that it was a viper, the only poisonous snake in Britain . Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Vile_DR Posted May 2, 2005 Report Share Posted May 2, 2005 ...the Life of a Cat...No worries, no worries, no worries..."It is hard to imagine a dream waking your up...right?" Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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