Try Some Of These

[martymas]

Thoughts!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sometimes, when I look at my children, I say to

myself, "Lillian,

you should have remained a virgin." - Lillian Carter

(mother of Jimmy

Carter)

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More and more businesses are starting to welcome

nursing mothers.

Breast-feeding women are welcome at Burger King and

Starbucks. I'm

not sure about Hooters. I think those breasts are

mainly for display

purposes only. - Jay Leno

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Harry and Esther are out shopping one morning when

Esther says,

"Darling, it's my mother's birthday tomorrow. What

shall we buy for

her? She said she would like something electric."

Harry replies, "How about a chair?"

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When I was young I dreamed of being a test pilot.

Flying higher,

faster, farther. Risking my life for the science of

aviation! But

when I grew up I found out I wasn't qualified because

of my poor

eyesight. Now I work in a post office, which gives me

many of the

same thrills ..., I'm always pushing the envelope!

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In the frozen foods department of our local grocery

store, I noticed

a man shopping with his son. As I walked by, he

checked something off

his list, and I heard him whisper conspiratorially to

the child, "You

know, if we really mess this up, we'll never have to

do it again."

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The little girl went to church for the first time. As

she was leaving

with her parents, the minister asked how she had liked

church.

"I liked the music," she replied, "but the commercial

was too long."

[goman87]

haha.