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One day in the future, George W. Bush has a heart

attack and dies. He immediately goes to hell, where

the Devil is waiting for him.

"I don't know what to do here," says the Devil. "You

are on my list, but I have no room for you. You

definitely have to stay here, so I'll tell you what

I'm going to do. I've got a couple folks here who

weren't quite as bad as you. I'll let one of them go,

but you have to take their place. I'll even let YOU

decide who leaves."

Bush thought that sounded pretty good, so the Devil

opened the first room. In it was Richard Nixon and a

large pool of water. He kept diving in and surfacing

empty handed. Over and over and over. Such was his

fate in hell. "No," George said. "I don't think so.

I'm not a good swimmer and I don't think I could do

that all day long."

The Devil led him to the next room. In it was Newt

Gingrich with a Sledgehammer and a room full of rocks.

All he did was swing that hammer, time after time

after time. "No, I've got this problem with my

shoulder. I would be in constant agony if all I could

do was break rocks all day," commented George.

The devil opened a third door. In it, Bush saw Bill

Clinton, lying on the floor with his arms staked over

his head, and his legs staked in a spread-eagle pose.

Bent over him was Monica Lewinsky, doing what she does

best . Bush took a look around in disbelief and

finally said, "Yeah, I can handle this.

"The Devil smiled sardonically and said......

"OK, Monica, you're free to go."

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