Philosophies Of The Famous

[bozodog]

Sometimes, when I look at my children, I say to myself ~~"Lillian, you should have remained a virgin."

- Lillian Carter (mother of Jimmy Carter)

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I had a rose named after me and I was very flattered. But I was not pleased to read the description in the catalog: "No good in a bed, but fine against a wall."

-- Eleanor Roosevelt

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Last week, I stated this woman was the ugliest woman I had ever seen. I have since been visited by her sister, and now wish to withdraw that statement.

-- Mark Twain

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The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending; and to have the two as close together as possible.

-- George Burns

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Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people only once a year.

- - Victor Borge

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Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.

-- Mark Twain

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By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you'll become happy; if you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher.

-- Socrates

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I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury

-- Groucho Marx

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Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar and fat.

Alex Levine

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I don't feel old. I don't feel anything until noon.

Then it's time for my nap.

-- Bob Hope

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I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it.

-- W.C. Fields

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We could certainly slow the aging process down if it had to work its way through Congress.

-- Will Rogers

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Don't worry about avoiding temptation as you grow older, it will avoid you

-- Winston Churchill

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Maybe it's true that life begins at fifty, but everything else starts to wear out, fall out, or spread out.

-- Phyllis Diller

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By the time a man is wise enough to watch his step, he's too old to go anywhere.

-- Billy Crystal

[JDoors]

Philosophy: unintelligible answers to insoluble problems.

--Henry Brooks Adams

The philosophy of one century is the common sense of the next.

--Henry Ward Beecher