Only A Southerner Knows................

[jimras]

Only a Southerner knows the difference between a hissie fit and a

conniption fit, and that you don't "HAVE" them, you "PITCH" them.

_____

Only a Southerner knows how many fish, collard greens, turnip greens,

peas, beans, etc., make up "a mess."

_____

Only a Southerner can show or point out to you the general direction of

"yonder."

_____

Only a Southerner knows exactly how long "directly" is, ... as in: "Goin'

to town, be back directly."

_____

Even Southern babies know that "Gimme some sugar" is not a request for

the white, granular sweet substance that sits in a pretty little bowl

in the middle of the table.

_____

All Southerners know exactly when "by and by" is. They might not use the

term, but they know the concept well.

_____

Only a Southerner knows instinctively that the best gesture of solace for

a neighbor who's got trouble is a plate of hot fried chicken and a big

bowl of cold potato salad. If the neighbor's trouble is a real crisis,

they also know to add a large banana puddin'.

_____

Only Southerners grow up knowing the difference between "right near" and

"a right far piece." They also know that "just down the road" can be one

mile or 20.

_____

No true Southerner would ever assume that the car with the flashing turn

signal is actually going to make a turn.

_____

A Southerner knows that "fixin'" can be used as a noun, a verb, or an

adverb.

_____

In the South, "y'all" is singular .... "all y'all" is plural.

_____

Southerners know grits come from corn and how to eat them.

_____

Every Southerner knows tomatoes with eggs, bacon, grits, and coffee are

perfectly wonderful; that red eye gravy is also a breakfast food; and

that fried green tomatoes are not a breakfast food

_____

When you hear someone say, "Well, I caught myself lookin'," you know you

are in the presence of a genuine Southerner.

_____

Only true Southerners say "sweet tea" and "sweet milk." Sweet tea

indicates the need for sugar and lots of it -- we do not like our tea

unsweetened. "Sweet milk" means you don't want buttermilk

_____

And a true Southerner knows you don't scream obscenities at little old

ladies who drive 30 MPH on the freeway. You just say, "Bless her heart ..."

and go your own way.

_____

And to those of you who are still having a hard time understanding all

this Southern stuff ... bless your hearts, I hear they are fixin' to

have classes on Southern as a second language.

_____

And for those who are not from the South but have lived here for a long

time, all y'all need a sign to hang on y'alls front porch that reads "I

ain't from the South, but I got here as fast as I could."

____

Bless your hearts ... y'all have a blessed day!

[Honda_Boy]

Funny.

And a true Southerner knows you don't scream obscenities at little old

ladies who drive 30 MPH on the freeway. You just say, "Bless her heart ..."

and go your own way.

That's a lie if I've ever heard one. I am southern through and through, and not only do I holler at ANYONE while driving, my family and lots of my friends do too.

Also it's throwin' a hissie fit and havin a conniption.

Born and raised southern by people born and raised southern. Grandparents the same. Long family history in the south.

Edited January 5, 2007 by Honda_Boy

[JDoors]

... a true Southerner knows you don't scream obscenities at little old ladies who drive 30 MPH on the freeway. You just say, "Bless her heart ..."

and go your own way. ...

Then I have earned the title of "Honorary Southerner" because I finally have come to respect those older drivers -- I'm gonna be one soon enough and I know fer a fact I'll still want to drive, so now I give them their space and respect their ability to drive -- at all.