His First Name

[mikex]

The day finally arrived. Forest Gump dies and goes to Heaven. He is at the

Pearly Gates, met by St. Peter himself. However, the gates are closed, and

Forest approaches the gatekeeper.

St. Peter said, "Well, Forest, it is certainly good to see you. We have

heard a lot about you. I must tell you, though, that the place is filling up

fast, and we have been administering an entrance examination for everyone.

The test is short, but you have to pass it before you can get into Heaven."

Forest responds, "It sure is good to be here, St. Peter, sir. But nobody

ever told me about any entrance exam. I sure hope that the test ain't too

hard. Life was a big enough test as it was."

St. Peter continued, "Yes, I know, Forest, but the test is only three

questions.

First: What two days of the week begin with the letter T?

Second: How many seconds are there in a year?\

Third: What is God's first name?"

Forest leaves to think the questions over. He returns the next day and sees

St. Peter, who waves him up, and says, "Now that you have had a chance to

think the questions over, tell me your answers."

Forest replied, "Well, the first one -- which two days in the week begins

with the letter "T"? Shucks, that one is easy. That would be Today and

Tomorrow."

The Saint's eyes opened wide and he exclaimed, "Forest, that is not what I

was thinking, but you do have a point, and I guess I did not specify, so I

will give you credit for that answer. How about the next one?" asked St.

Peter.

"How many seconds in a year? Now that one is harder," replied Forest, but I

thunk and thunk about that, and I guess the only answer can be twelve."

Astounded, St. Peter said, "Twelve? Twelve? Forest, how in Heaven's name

could you come up with twelve seconds in a year?"

Forest replied, "Shucks, there's got to be twelve: January 2nd, February

2nd, March 2nd... "

"Hold it," interrupts St. Peter. "I see where you are going with this, and

I see your point, though that was not quite what I had in mind....but I will

have to give you credit for that one, too. Let us go on with the third and

final question. Can you tell me God's first name"?

"Sure," Forest replied, "it's Andy."

"Andy?" exclaimed an exasperated and frustrated St Peter.

"Ok, I can understand how you came up with your answers to my first two

questions, but just how in the world did you come up with the name Andy as

the first name of God?"

"Shucks, that was the easiest one of all," Forest replied. "I learnt it

from the song,

ANDY WALKS WITH ME, ANDY TALKS WITH ME, ANDY TELLS ME I AM HIS OWN."

St. Peter opened the Pearly Gates, and said: "Run Forest, run."

Give me a sense of humor, Lord.

Give me the ability to understand a ,clean joke,

To get some humor out of life,

And to pass it on to other folk.

[jimras]

Ah, very good, very good!!

[Potato2k4]

Haha very clever

[martymas]

i dont want to sound negitive

whos forest gump?

marty

[bobbynichols]

i dont want to sound negitive

whos forest gump?

marty

Hey Marty !!!

Forest Gump (see wiki) was the main character in the movie of the same name that was a blockbuster hit here in the States a while back. I know that you'd get a 'hoot' out of it if you rented it.

[blim]

Agreed with Bobby, Marty. You should see if Forrest Gump is available to rent in NZ, can't see why it wouldn't be--it was a Blockbuster here in US. Uplifting and cute story that shows that no one can truly measure intelligence!!

Liz

Edited January 2, 2007 by blim