From The Year 2029

[bozodog]

Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest country in the world, Mexifornia, formerly known as California. White minorities still trying to have English recognized as Mexifornia's third language.

Spotted Owl plague threatens northwestern United States crops and livestock.

Baby conceived naturally. Scientists stumped.

Couple petitions court to reinstate heterosexual marriage.

Last remaining Fundamentalist Muslim dies in the AmericanTerritory of the Middle East (formerly known as Iraq, Afghanistan, Syria and Lebanon).

Iran still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least 10 more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.

France pleads for global help after being taken over by Jamaica.

Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking..

George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2036.

Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.

85-year $75.8 billion study: Diet and Exercise is the key to weight loss.

Average weight of Americans drops to 250 lbs.

Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast shutter speed, they now can photograph a woman with her mouth shut.

Massachusetts executes last remaining conservative.

Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals violates their civil rights.

Average height of NBA players is now nine feet, seven inches.

New federal law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly swatters and rolled-up newspapers must be registered by January 2036.

Congress authorizes direct deposit to campaign accounts of formerly illegal political contributions .

IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75 percent.

Florida voters still having trouble with voting machines.

[Dan72]

sounds about right

[JDoors]

85-year $75.8 billion study: Diet and Exercise is the key to weight loss.

... However, chocolate, ice cream and pizza still considered to be healthy alternatives to brocolli, spinach and whole wheat.

[martymas]

Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast shutter speed, they now can photograph a woman with her mouth shut.

marty

[JDoors]

Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast shutter speed, they now can photograph a woman with her mouth shut.

marty

Just to be fair: Forensic archeologists discovered fingerprints on an ancient map that, after DNA analysis, are believed to belong to a human male. Scientists are waiting for confirmation of these results as the scientific community does not believe it is possible.