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Hey, Don't blame me I only pass them on...

1. Two antennas meet on a roof, fall in love and get


The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was


2. Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar. One says,

"I've lost my electron."

The other says, "Are you sure?"

Thefirst replies,"Yes, I'm positive..."

3. A jumper cable walks into a bar.

The bartender says,"I'll serve you, but don't start anything."

4. Two peanuts walk into a bar, and one was a


5. A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

6. A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt

under his arm and says: "A beer please, and one for the


7. Two cannibals are eating a clown.

One says to the other,"Does this taste funny to you?"

8. "Doc, I can't stop singing 'The Green, GreenGrass of Home.'"

"That sounds like Tom Jones Syndrome."

"Is it common?"

"It's Not Unusual."

9. Two cows standing next to each other in a field;

Daisysays to Dolly, "I was artificially inseminated this


"I don't believe you," said Dolly.

"It's true, no bull!" exclaimed Daisy.

10. An invisible man marries an invisible woman.

The kids were nothing to look at either.

11. Deja Moo: The feeling that you've heard this bull before.

12. A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet and says,

"My dog's cross-eyed, is there anything you can do for him?"

"Well," says the vet, "let's have a look at him."

So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes, then checks his


Finally, he says, "I'm going to have to put himdown."

"What? Because he's cross-eyed?"

"No, because he's really heavy."

13. Apparently, one in five people in the world are Chinese.

There are five people in my family, so it must be one of them.

It's either my Mom or my Dad, or maybe my older brother

Colin or my younger brother Ho-Cha-Chu. But, I'm

pretty sure it's Colin.

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