Some Of The Enhancement Drugs


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Viagra: The Sequel

We received this update on the Pfizer Pharmaceutical Company's new drug release information bulletin:

With Viagra such a hit, Pfizer is bringing forth a whole new line of drugs oriented towards improving the performance of men in today's society.

DIRECTRA - a dose of this drug given to men before leaving on car trips caused 72 percent of them to stop and ask directions when they got lost, compared to a control group of 0.2 percent.

PROJECTRA - Men given this experimental new drug were far more likely to actually finish a household repair project before starting a new one.

CHILDAGRA - Men taking this drug reported a sudden, overwhelming urge to perform more childcare tasks, especially cleaning up spills and "little accidents."

COMPLIMENTRA - In clinical trials, 82 percent of middle-aged men administered this drug noticed that their wives had a new hairstyle. Currently being tested to see if its effects extend to noticing new clothing.

BUYAGRA - Married and otherwise attached men reported a sudden urge to buy their sweeties expensive jewelry and gifts after taking this drug for only two days. Still to be seen, whether the drug can be continued for a period longer than your favorites store's return limit.

NEGA-VIAGRA - Has the exact opposite effect of Viagra. Currently undergoing clinical trials on sitting US presidents.

NEGA-SPORTAGRA- This drug had the strange effect of making men want to turn off televised sports and actually converse with other family members.

FLATULAGRA - This complex drug converts men's noxious intestine gases back into food solids. Special bonus: Dosage can be doubled for long car rides.

FLYAGRA - This drug has been showing great promise in treating men with O. F. D. (Open fly disorder). Especially useful for men on Viagra.

PRYAGRA - About to fail its clinical trial, this drug gave men in the test group an irresistible urge to dig into the personal affairs of other people. Note: Apparent overdose turned three test subjects into "special prosecutors."

LIAGRA - This drug causes men to be less then truthful when being asked about their sexual affairs. Will be available in Regular, Grand Jury and Presidential strength versions.

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